Growing up in a bicultural family can be hilarious and traumatizing. It's like being stuck in the middle not knowing who to believe. Plus trying to find self-identity when you can't make sense of your own cultural is a crisis. As a child, I couldn't figure out what language to speak without my parents fighting over which was better for me. My parents have strong characters with a lot of pride. My dad would say, "man your family calls a lot," and my mother would reply, "at least I get a phone call," and this would start up a never ending argument. My dad would tell me to eat one way while my mom shook her head.
So... I created my own rules because they made me feel crazy at times. I didn't listen to what was "right," so this made them both upset. My sister and I never had a peaceful childhood. We would laugh it off because we didn't know what to say. When you're a kid you believe every lie and end up more confused as you get older. Don't get me wrong, I embrace both cultures and would love to learn the Russian language soon, but it has taken me years to develop a sense of identity because I've been pulled in two opposite directions. I even had people ask what side do I identify with more and why. I just said both and I am trying to get to know my dad's side a little more because his family is very reserved.
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| My Father and I. |
My main goal is to visit Ukraine, learn the traditions, eat the food, arts, opera, dance the music, and soak up the history. Hopefully, I can find some family out there to share my life with and reconnect back to my roots. I love being mixed because I can embrace the differences and find my own identity within both. Does anyone feel the same? What has helped you in dealing with the chaos? I would like to know how people self-identify after growing up in a bicultural family.
